An imagined headline: "Tiger escaped from the circus after the ringmaster left the tiger in a cardboard box."

"Look how scary the tiger is," the ringmaster exclaimed, adding, "tickets are only $100 a pop, get them while they last!"

Later: "I can't believe the tiger mauled those people. We're all looking for who did this," said an unidentified man dressed in a red tailcoat and tophat covered in blood.